Christian mystics such as Teresa of Avila and Catherine of
Siena warned of something they called, “the consolations of prayer.” Especially as you begin the practice of
contemplative prayer, you might find intense feelings of calm, joy and
well-being. The novice practitioner
assumes that these feelings are a regular part of the practice and so begins to
pray with the expectation of experiencing those feelings, or consolations. As you continue to practice, you will find
that such feelings don’t happen every time or may have been the early
by-product of allowing yourself to slow down and breathe deeply. The mystics advise that to truly seek God in
prayer, one must look for God beyond the consolations of prayer, enduring times
where God seems distant and prayer is difficult.
I see a
similar issue in current forms of worship.
In my last post I wrote about worship that manufactures feeling, using music,
lighting and other techniques to make one feel a certain way. In many Lutheran circles, the desired feeling
is often one of comfort. We choose music
and worship styles that soothe and do not challenge. In other traditions, the goal is to inspire a
sense of awe, wonder and mystery. In
both cases I have spoken with worshipers who don’t think that worship is
authentic if the feeling is absent.
There
is confusion around feeling and faith.
As I wrote early on, I see a sense of awe and wonder as a virtue to be
cultivated, a feeling that pulls us from naval-gazing to a connection with the
glory of God, the immensity of creation, the vastness that is outside of
us. Awe is a feeling that can orient us
toward God, but awe is not a relational faith in God. As
United Church of Christ pastor Lillian Daniels writes, “Any idiot can find God
in a sunset.” That is, most people have
moments where they feel awe and wonder, standing at the edge of Grand Canyon, stargazing
on a clear night, watching the sunset over the ocean. These are moments that cause us to breathe
deeply and forget everything else, moments that pull us beyond ourselves and
the concerns of the day. Awe is a
powerful feeling, but it is also fleeting.
The sun sets and the ocean becomes dark.
The sun rises and the starlight fades.
We step away from the edge of the canyon.
Awe can push us towards faith. Awe can strengthen and deepen existing
faith. But awe itself is not faith but a
feeling. I suspect that when someone
says that she finds God in a sunset what she really means is that she
experiences awe at the sunset. Likewise,
when someone tells me he finds God in nature, he really means he has a feeling
of awe in nature. It is a good
feeling. I have it too and enjoy it, but
it isn’t faith. The nature of faith is
too large to cover in this post, but suffice it to say that enjoying the scent
of a delicious meal is very different from sitting down and eating it.
To be clear, it is my hope that
people feel awe and wonder. I think it
is a very good thing if only for the fact that it puts things into
perspective. I am an advocate for
finding wonder in the everyday and the ordinary. Yet the feeling of awe is not the endpoint
but a starting place for faith. If we
can experience awe in the present moment, marveling at the miracle of each
second, the complicated cycles that happen with every breath and heartbeat, we
are put in a much better place to marvel at the good news that the God who is
beyond our understanding wants to be in relationship with us, wants to extend
the wonder of life into eternity, joins us in our humanity not as a blazing
superhero (Transfiguration aside) but as one of us.
We are also put in a much better
place to marvel at the miracle that is our neighbor. Even the neighbor you may not enjoy is a
wonder to behold, a wonder of breath and heartbeat and life. Jesus drew attention to those who were
forgotten. Jesus could have begun his
ministry with the Roman leadership, the imperial court, wealth and power. Instead he invited fisherfolk to walk with
him. He could have focused on the
religious elite. Instead he drew
attention to the unclean and unworthy.
He saw each person as precious, marvelous and wonderful. When we find wonder in the present moment,
the simple miracles that happen all around us, we are walking the path with
Jesus.
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